I eat your horse!

I know you probably think that I've completely neglected this blog, and in a way you are correct. The truth is, I've been writing a lot, but not on a computer. I've gone old school. Notebooks. I am working on something big, and I will tell you more about it later. For now, I hope you accept this picture as a peace offering. I know it's an old picture you may have seen before, but I still think it's funny.

P.S. I never blogged about the great loss we suffered. RIP Bea Arthur. Thank you for being a friend. Bea has been and will continue to be an important part of my blog.

2009 New Year's Resolutions

Now that all my bass parts have been recorded for the upcoming AFI record, and I have finally finished watching all of the Begin Transmission video submissions, I had a chance to finish up my list of resolutions for the new year.

TRANQUIL MAMMOTH'S
NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS
FOR 2009
1. Blog More Often - I have a tendency to write long blogs, and that takes time. In 2009, I resolve to also write shorter, more frequent blogs as well. Sometimes a good picture is enough. Pictures = 1000 words, right?

2. Join A Celebrity Gym - Since my body is somewhere between Beaker and Bubbles De Vere (both celebrities), I naturally feel like I should join a celebrity gym where I can run on the treadmill next to people like Phil Collins and Bea Arthur. In a celebrity gym, this would be possible. I would to be able to ask Michael "Biv" Bivins or Conan O'Brien if they will spot me. "Hey Neil Patrick Harris, are you done with those 75 lb. dumbells?" I would look over when I'm on the eliptical and see David Bowie working up a sweat. George Michael, would have a fresh towel for me to borrow, and Jeff Garlin (well he should be there) would let me borrow some coins for the vending machine. On another day, I'd see the Olsen twins and Steve Martin working on their abs with one of those inflatable balls. I'd see Snoop Doggy Dogg and Stevie Wonder on the (tandem) exercycle, and the dad from Silver Spoons working those glutes. I'd also see Bruce Lee somehow. Yes, in 2009, I resolve to join a celebrity gym if only for the chance to see these people, and the many other celebrities that I haven't mentioned in my blog over the years.

3. Learn Latin

4. Quit Smocking - Before you jump at the chance to correct my typo (it's not a typo) or yell at me for smoking (I don't smoke) I'd like to send you HERE. Can you believe how many people misspell smoking? Typos bother me, but misspelled words drive me up the wall! This isn't really a resolution- or is it? In 2009, I resolve to triple spell check EVERYTHING I write, including text messages. You should too.

5. Clean Out The Spare Closet - I have a spare closet that is filled with things I couldn't possibly use. Things like The Force's Complete Discography on 12" vinyl. In 2009, I resolve to get rid of these things at any cost, even if it means selling them on ebay. Wait! That's it! In 2009, I resolve to sell a bunch of stuff on ebay! Stayed tuned for details!!

6. Go Even Greener - In 2006 we saw An Inconvenient Truth and it freaked us out. We panicked, and started recycling and carpooling, but eventually we forgot about greenhouse gasses. In 2007, the Live Earth Concerts reminded us that our carbon footprint needed to be smaller (or nonexistent) and we freaked out again. We brought our own bags to the grocery store, traded our SUVs for Priuses and even thought about solar panels, but eventually we forgot about saving the planet. In 2008, gas prices soared so high that we ditched our cars and took the bus, or the train, or a bike, or even our feet. Companies started responding to the consumers' need for "green" versions of existing products. We made more steps in the right direction, but we keep running into the same problem: when we don't notice immediate changes, we give up and our efforts fade into history. In 2009, I resolve to continue to modify my lifestyle to better preserve the planet for future generations. Going green isn't something you do once. It's not a light bulb you buy, it's a change you make in your lifestyle and in the way you think.

So that's my list. What are your resolutions for the year 2009?

****UPDATE!!!! JANUARY 10, 2009 3:40 PM****
7. Learn The Guitar Solo From Skid Row's "I Remember You" - I forgot to add this very important one. It was early and I hadn't had any coffee yet. Dave "The Snake" Sabo Scotti Hill. Pinch harmonics. Bends. Palm mutes. Hammer-ons. Pull-offs. Dives. This one has it all! In 2008, I resolved to learn the solo from Aerosmith's "Angel" and in 2009, it will be Skid Row's "I Remember You."

The Canadian Long Weekend

My dear readers, I sincerely apologize for taking so long between blog entries. With the current state of the economy, I know you guys and gals get enraged very easily and need the constant distraction that Tranquil Mammoth provides. I won't let it happen again. I've had some problems with my internet service here in Mammothland (that's where Tranq lives) and decided to finally give in and upgrade to the 2400 baud modem. Isn't she a beauty?

In other news, it was a Canadian "long weekend." I had the distinct honor of playing shakers with Tegan and Sara at three of their concerts in Los Angeles, California. They are such a great band. If for some reason you don't already own all of their albums, I suggest you stop reading right now and go purchase them! My pal Matt Sharp (of weezer and Rentals fame) joined me on the tambourine. I found a shaky (no pun intended) version of it on youtube, but the audio is horrible, so don't feel obligated to click here. It reminded me of one of those family bands, or perhaps an all-star variety show from the 1970s. Anyhow, it was a really fun weekend and I'd like to say hello to all the people that I talked to at the shows. Hello!
On a side note, I literally almost had to shave Canadian Kid In The Hall, Kevin McDonald's back in front of a few hundred people on Saturday. Weird. Weird that I'm not making this up, because that seems like something I would make up (c'mon...Bea Arthur!?), but it's 100% true.

If you're like me and you haven't already figured out what you're going to be for Halloween, now is the time to get on it! We have ten days to scrape something together! If anyone has any good ideas, let me know in the comments. When you leave it up to the last minute, you end dressing like WHAM! era George Michael, or Andrew W.K..

I'm out like a trout, but before I go, I'd like to send a shout out to Freaky-B, Fuzz Fuzz, Lil' Ridiculous, Klerpy, Lo-Blud Suge, Sh'shaun Sean, Ol' Baby, Turkey Vultch, Clawsy, and Michael Bivins.

Update! Hunter interviewed by Bea Arthur!

Since everyone loves an update, I thought I'd post this interview I found online yesterday. The funny thing is, I don't remember doing this interview. Oh well...Enjoy!

Hunter Burgan: Before we get started, I just have to tell you that I recently watched some episodes of Maude on DVD...and you are hilarious! I love it more than Golden Girls!

Bea Arthur*: Thank you. So what's new, Hunter? What have you been up to?

Hunter: Well, Bea, I've been pretty busy. AFI has been working non-stop on new songs, Hunter Revenge is playing the Pomona Warped Tour on Friday, I bought new curtains, Dan Kelly and I just finished mixing a record for our friends' band, I've been drinking lots of coffee, I have a new shoe coming out soonish and well...I've also been planning some secret stuff.

Bea: Secret Stuff? Well you'll have to tell me about that later, but first...tell me, what do the new AFI songs sound like?

Hunter: They're great. We have a bunch of really catchy songs that I think you're going to love...even with your finicky taste, Bea.

Bea: Well you know I'm partial to the Stones and Zeppelin.

Hunter: And I'm confident that you'll find a place in your heart for our new stuff as well.

Bea: We'll see about that.

Hunter: Yeah we will.

Bea: Moving on... Tell me about Hunter Revenge's show this Friday.

Hunter: It's Warped Tour, in Pomona, and I'm playing the Kevin Says Stage which is a smaller, more intimate stage.

Bea: So the audience will be closer to you.

Hunter: Exactly! Hunter Revenge is not about barricades and boundaries. It's about intimacy and relationships...the relationship between the band and the audience.

Bea: Speaking of your band...who do you have playing with you this time?

Hunter: Dan Kelly, as always, will be playing keyboards. Ian Fowles from The Aquabats will be playing bass, and Ryan Seaman will return to the drums for his first appearance with me since 2005. It's going to be a lot of fun.

Bea: Just out of curiosity, will you be selling shirts or records?

Hunter: Just shirts and CDs.

Bea: Well that sounds like a blast. I'll try to make it out there. Where can I get tickets?

Hunter: You can buy tickets by clicking here.

Bea: Did you just insert a link?

Hunter: Yeah.

Bea: Cool. Now let's talk about these curtains. What do you look for in a curtain?

Hunter: For me, a curtain needs to be tall, dark and thick.

Bea: You're a man of my taste.

Hunter: Bea! I'm talking about curtains, not-

Bea: So am I.

Hunter: You dirty bird!

Bea: Moving along... What band did you and Dan Kelly mix?

Hunter: They're called Artichoke Heart Soufflé. They write fun songs...the whole project was fun. Have you heard of them?

Bea: Yeah, well no, but I was just looking at their website. Cute drawings. So what else is going on...oh yes...coffee?

Hunter: Yeah. I love the dark roast. "Dark and crisp" as Jarrod Alexander would say.

Bea: Mmmm that sounds good right now. So when is your new shoe coming out?

Hunter: It comes out in the Spring '09 collection, which comes out well before Spring the season.

Bea: Yeah that always confuses me. Why are the seasons for fashion out of sync with the real seasons?

Hunter: No one will ever know.

Bea: And I'm going to assume that this is another collaboration with Macbeth?

Hunter: Yes you are, Bea, and it will be a correct assumption.

Bea: Ok Hunter, I need to wrap this up. Before we go, can you tell me anything about the "secret stuff" you're planning?

Hunter: Not if I want to maintain the secrecy. However, I will tell you that both Matt Wedgley and I have put a lot of time into this so far.

Bea: I have an idea of what you might be talking about, but I won't say anything. If it's what I think it is, then it's going to be AMAZING!

Hunter: Thanks...it will be!

Bea: When will you let everyone in on your secret?

Hunter: In a couple of weeks...just keep your eyes and ears open.

Bea: I'll be sure to. Thank you for the interview Hunter.

Hunter: Thanks, Bea.

*may not be the real Bea Arthur, so just to avoid any libel suits, let's just say that this isn't the real Bea Arthur.

Greetings, Earth-babies...

Hunter Revenge - "Who's Gonna Love U Now?"

The new video for the semi-new song by Hunter Revenge is now available to the public! It's the first of a few video projects I am working on right now. As you may have already heard, Hunter Revenge's record label approved a budget of $1.00 for this video, so my dreams of shooting on 35mm were just not going to come true. Instead, I bought a Snoop Doggy Dogg postcard and used my digital camera. I was also going to get Stevie Wonder to make an appearance, but he never returned my calls.



Enjoy my video, and feel free to create video responses and post them on youtube. Parody is the new black.



Stay Fresh,
Hunter


P.S. Props to Bea Arthur for being the OG queen of HTML.